Monday, January 12, 2015

Alchemical transformation continues.

Falling inwards really intensely. Dropping ego structures majorly. Feels like I am dissolving. Wishes and directive thoughts to be found less. The God - Union moving further into destroying / dismantling deeper and more expansively, erasing humanness. 

"Me" is being removed further and with that things the personality does; like want, direct, ask, focus, require, imagine, create. Even socialize. Feels awesome and confusing. 

I feel that I can no longer try to be human, try to fit in, try to make sense, try to behave so that I will be understood. It's falling away now.

I can no longer socialize on society's terms. Though I have developed social skills and communication skills, I can no longer perform those arts. Can only be nakedly real. Silent or honest and direct. No more frills. I can no longer hold up the appearances of suitable, agreeable and graceful. It will be Raw or Nothing at all. Silence or Truth.